I've been driving for about an hour-and-45-minutes and I'm now about 18-minutes away from home, and I really have to pee. My bladder is so full. Why didn't I go before I left? These bumpy roads aren't helping at all. Each time I hit a pothole, it sends a shock wave through my bladder. Traffic is horrid, too. I get stuck behind a bus, a tractor, no, that's two tractors. I'm trying to clench together to hold it in. Clenching works, but releasing is like telling my bladder, "It's pee time!" These corners aren't helping, nor is shifting gears. I've put my finger in my crotch. I'm hoping it will act like a plug. I'm getting closer. Better get my door keys ready. I'm afraid I won't make it. There's my drive! I'm home, but I'm afraid a sudden movement will make things bad. Ah, my door's open. Have to go upstairs and -- oh no! Some came out! I'm not going to make it! There's no time to take down my jeans!